> see awesome post about non-European history
> see medievalpoc reblogging and linking to themselves
I love history. I won’t lie. But I hate this fucking revisionist trend from America that before the Colonial powers came about, the world was a mother-fucking wonderland and Europe has been populated by nothing but barbarians.
Here’s a shaking revelation to everyone out there.
Everyone started as unwashed barbarians sometime.
Barbarians originally inhabited Europe you twat. Then they took over rome
ARIEL YOU STUPID IDIOT YOUR BRA DOESNT MATCH YOUR TAIL YOU LOOK LIKE A FREAKING FASHION CATASTROPHE
BUT NEITHER DOES HER SISTER WITH THE YELLOW TAIL AND GREEN BRA
WHY ARE WE SCREAMING ABOUT THE LITTLE MERMAID?
I DON’T KNOW BUT IT SEEMED NECESSARY?
WHILE WE’RE AT IT, WHY DO THEY ALL HAVE DIFFERENT HAIR COLOR? I DON’T KNOW IF THIS IS GENETICALLY POSSIBLE WITH JUST TWO PARENTS! SOMEONE WITH SCIENCE FIGURE THIS OUT!
ARE THEY ACTUALLY SISTERS? BECAUSE, HAIR COLOR ASIDE THE GENETICS BEHIND DIFFERENT TAIL COLORS (BEING SO DISTINCT) WOULD BE EVEN MORE IMPROBABLE
I MEAN, WE NEVER SEE A MOTHER! THERE COULD BE MULTIPLE WOMEN INVOLVED IN TRITON’S LOVE LIFE!
PERHAPS THEY’RE HALF-SISTERS? OR MAYBE THEY DYED THEIR HAIR? COULD IT BE POSSIBLE THAT THEY DYED THEIR TAILS AS WELL?
I’M PRETTY SURE ALL OF THOSE HAIR COLORS COULD COME FROM TWO PARENTS. LIKE, IF TRITON HAS BRUNETTE AND REDHEAD ALLELES AND THE MOM HAS BLONDE AND REDHEAD ALLELES THIS IS TOTALLY POSSIBLE. AND IF WE ASSUME THAT TAIL COLOR IS CONTROLLED SEPARATELY FROM HAIR COLOR I FAIL TO SEE AN ISSUE. MERMAIDS COULD HAVE.. THEY COULD EVEN BE CODOMINANT. SO THEY’RE ALL EITHER RED DOMINANT OR BLUE DOMINANT. DIFFERENT COMBINATIONS OF EITHER RED OR BLUE ALLELES COULD ACCOUNT FOR ALL OF THEM. THERE.
Only on tumblr will you see a discussion about the science behind physical traits of characters in a Disney movie
YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE SCREAMING GET WITH THE PROGRAM
I think you’re talking about this post.
Three potential problems for dwarves are addressed in the elf post. Like elves, fantasy dwarves rarely leave their halls (isolation), there are always few dwarf women (slow reproductive rate), and dwarves usually live for a few hundred years (poor time management). As for flaws specific to dwarves:
- Greed. This one has been examined a lot - hell, The Hobbit is basically Bilbo tagging along with a group of treasure hunters. Dwarves love their metals, gems, and mithril. They will fight to the death to protect their mines.
- Family. I want stories that at least brush on how dwarves raise their dwarflets and/or on how dwarves view love and/or friendship and/or gender, because most of the dwarf stories are bachelor dwarfs running around with other bachelor dwarfs.
- Adaptations to living underground. Dwarves are often described as having tunneled deep within the mountain/lived in the mountain for millennia. I know the fantasy world isn’t like the modern world, but seriously, evolution? They may have evolved larger eyes for seeing in the dark, more body hair to keep warm in the cold tunnels, and a sharper sense of smell to detect gas leaks. All in all, a being with different senses than a human (or an elf).
- Food?? Since all dwarves are obsessed with mining, it begs the question: What do they eat? I will give Paolini credit for making massive mushroom farms and giving the dwarves herds of game animals. (I will not do this again.) There’s also lots of ale in the dwarf towns, but no explanation on who’s farming the wheat or fermenting it to make ale happen.
- Economy. Dwarves love their gold and they also seem to like hoarding it like a dragon. (Plot bunny: character walks into huge, gold-filled cave expecting dragon, attacked by dozens of angry dwarves.) They can get food/other supplies by selling it. (Plot bunny 2: faction that wants more dairy vs. faction that wants to keep the gold where it belongs.)
- Why do they hate the elves? Kind of credit for Paolini because the dwarf/elf dislike is because the dwarves are religious and the elves are atheist, but not full credit because Paolini uses it as his soapbox for why atheism is better. In Middle Earth, the elves routinely cheated the dwarves and vice versa for thousands of years. Anyway, you should give them a reason other than GRR ELVES ARE BAD.
However, the biggest problem with dwarves is that they’re all the same: short, gruff, male, ale-drinking, hairy treasure mongers. Make some cultural diversity within the dwarf population. Especially if they don’t get out a lot, their cultures will become unique to their population/mountain. Reflect that!